The Gut Wrenching Truth About Child Custody
What makes divorces so expensive? What makes divorces so anxiety ridden? It's not money. It is the fight over children. Simple cases turn into first class messes over the issue of child custody. If you have your money issues figured out, but you are gearing up for a child custody fight, then it is going to be emotional, trying and expensive regardless of how long you were married or how old your children are.
The truth of the matter is that if you can resolve your child custody issues, your case will be infinitely easier, not only for you, but your attorney and most importantly for your children.
Sometimes however, an amicable resolution is not possible. So, what do Courts consider when issuing child custody orders? In most cases, the Court will look at what is the "best interests" of the child. That does not equal what the child prefers. It might not mean who the better cook or the better disciplinarian is. It's a very broad test. In our experience, here are some of the things courts may look at depending on the case:
1. Which parent is more likely to facilitate contact between the child and the other parent
2. How is the child doing in school?
3. How are the parents co-parenting?
4. Which parent is more likely to follow the child's doctor's orders?
5. Does the child take sides in his/her parents' dispute?
6. Was there domestic violence? There are special rules for this.
7. Does the child have special needs and which parent most effectively addresses those needs?
Here is a video on how to deal with "liars contests". A "liars contest" is when two people make accusations at each other in Court and neither can prove what they are saying is correct. For example, Dad might accuse Mom of not being on time for picking up or dropping off. Or Mom might accuse Dad of not showing up at all to pick up the children. Here is how you win a liar's contest.
How you refer to your children also provides the Court with important clues as to what kind of parent you are, meaning, do you co-parent? Do you respect the other parent's role in your children's lives? Courts really want parents to co-parent if possible. Watch this video and master what it says:
If the Court has already entered Judgment and it contains permanent custody orders, in order to modify them, you might have to demonstrate what courts call a "child based change of circumstances" before the Court will entertain re-examining the child's best interests.
If you are facing a child custody battle, you need an aggressive divorce and family law attorney on your side fighting for your child's best interests.
As a parent, you have rights and responsibilities concerning your child and we understand how important it is to fight for every one of them. When your children are on the line, you deserve a legal professional dedicated to aggressively pursuing the result that you deserve throughout your custody dispute.
The relationship you have with your child is the most important. When a separation or divorce threatens the time you spend with your child or the child centered decisions you need to make- you should order a copy of our book and call us today at 805-449-4290.